I’ve been quiet lately, and I’m sorry.\u00a0 I should have sent out at least one project to a friend (sorry, Sue!), and I really should have been writing.\u00a0 And editing.\u00a0 And formatting.<\/p>\n
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I haven’t done anything this week except hunker down and try to ride the pain.<\/p>\n
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Pain is something that I should be used to.\u00a0 I was diagnosed with fibromyalgia in 1998, and for those who don’t know about this disease, it’s basically pain.\u00a0 Everywhere.\u00a0 All the time.\u00a0 It ebbs and flows, but there is precious little time that I don’t feel some level of pain.\u00a0 And, as I realized this week, pain is exhausting.\u00a0 Like, bone-numbing exhausting.\u00a0 As in, all I feel I’ve been doing is working, eating and sleeping.\u00a0 Seriously.<\/p>\n
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It’s getting old.<\/p>\n
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I don’t WANT to hurt all the time.\u00a0 I don’t WANT to be 40 years old and walking with a goddamn cane.\u00a0 I want to be healthy, as pain-free as I can get, and energetic.<\/p>\n
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I just don’t know how to do that yet.\u00a0 (This is normally the point where people jump in and tell me what they’ve done.\u00a0 I actually don’t want that today.\u00a0 I know it’s done to help, but it’s not what I need right now.)<\/p>\n
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But I’m learning.\u00a0\u00a0A lot of it is learning to accept that there are going to be days where the pain wins.\u00a0 Where I just can’t do more than get out of bed, drag myself to work, and then home to bed.\u00a0 Where the writing won’t get done.\u00a0 And that’s okay.\u00a0 Those days just need to not be every day.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
I’ve been quiet lately, and I’m sorry.\u00a0 I should have sent out at least one project to a friend (sorry, Sue!), and I really should have been writing.\u00a0 And editing.\u00a0 And formatting. I haven’t done anything this week except hunker down and try to ride the pain. Pain is something that I should …<\/p>\n