Half-way there.

Beaver dam at Moss Glen Falls, Vermont

The year is half-over today (okay, technically tomorrow, but bear with me). How is that possible? It totally feels like time is just – I don’t know. Perhaps because I have some very important doctor appointments starting tomorrow, and I’m simultaneously looking forward to them and dreading them.

Tomorrow, I meet with my new doctor at the Catholic Medical Center Weight Management Program. Wednesday, I meet with my new nutritionist and my new exercise therapist. I’m sure it’s going to be hard. For all that I like planning things out in my writing, I hate logging my food, which I’m sure will be a part of it. I hate being told what I can and cannot eat. I hate having to monitor myself. But I have to do something, because my weight is too much for my frame, and my eating habits are, to be honest, shit. Ever since Brian died, I’ve pretty much stopped cooking for myself and am living on convenience foods, which sucks.

I have to relearn things. I’ve let my therapy slip too (I know, I know), and it’s not going to be easy. But I’m trying to be honest with myself and you folks, so we’ll see how it goes.

Writing-wise: I’m working on my #morningpages habit again. August is going to be the month of getting to bed on time and getting up to write my pages before work. I’m also starting the plot vomit for Dreams. This week, I need to figure out the overarching theme/question of the book, now that I’ve realized that the antagonist I thought was the focus is not. Which, I mean, I guess yay for figuring it out before the book is written?

Have a good week, folks. Take care of yourself.

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