Archive for July 4th, 2022

No independence today

I’m feeling evil right now, because as a uterus owner in America, this is NOT my Independence Day (fuck you, Supreme Court, and the right wing). So instead of “celebrating,” I’m writing ghost stories and enjoying iced tea at a lovely coffee/tea shop in my hometown (shoutout to Brothers’ Cortado!). I went up to Pittsburgh, NH, on Saturday – the only point in NH with an official crossing to Canada – and did some work on Sapph. I’ve got to go and pick up my copy of Ghostology from Gibson’s Bookstore this week, and I’m currently reading The Ghosts of Borley because ghosts are eating my brain this week. I’ve just had a breakthrough in something that’s been bothering me for a long time (let’s be honest, since I started fooling with this idea some ten years ago) – the ecology of the Ghostlands. And I’m kicking myself because in hindsight, it’s so obvious, and yet…it’s not. But it works soooo well. And yeah, that’s all I’m giving you.

I’m also starting July off with some changes to how I look at things. I’ve been very open with my struggles with depression over the years, and I’m pretty convinced that depression was part of what contributed to my husband’s early death. However, unlike him, I’m actively working with my doctor and my therapist to bring my symptoms under control. The fact that my knees are killing me (much like his sciatica was bothering him in the last year or so of his life) and that I’m gaining weight (which is adding to things) is making me worry that I too won’t make it to 50. Which I do not accept. I have appointments in August with a PT and a nutritionist and a specialist in weight loss, and while I won’t be getting surgery, there are some other options I’m exploring. But a lot of it is taking responsibility for my own life, and that’s what I’m trying to do.

In other news, my goals this week are to do morning pages every day (which will force me to get up before I have to run out the door, and actually have a cup of tea and wake up before work), finish up my coif, and make my bed every day. Small goals. I think I can do it.

What are your goals this week?